Hoy ha sido un día glorioso de risas y bromas. No hay nada mejor que
reírnos de nosotros mismos y aguantar las bromas bien intencionadas de
los amigos o personas que comparten una tarde con nosotros.
Nuestra tarde ha sido compartida por Chari, Hugo y Daniel, desde las seis y media pasadas hasta las doce.
Hugo viene desde Murcia para ver a su pareja, Chari, madre de Daniel,
Gabriel y Fabiola, que ya han cumplido los veinte años y alguno más.
No obstante Chari es muy joven, tiene un humor estupendo y su amigo Hugo no le va a la zaga.
Con el yo me rio mucho, aguanta muy bien mis bromas y chascarrillos
sobre cualquier cosa que nos cuenta, enseguida a el se le pega y
comienza también a seguirme el rastro con humor y buen rollito.
Con nosotros cuatro estaba Cuca que miraba asombrada el manejo de
todos los juguetes electrónicos inimaginables que yo les iba enseñando y
trataba de venderles.
A Daniel un móvil estupendo HTC One que yo ya no utilizo, y haciendo
comparaciones le comentaba a Hugo que el suyo, un Samsung Note 2, era un
birria.
 |
| Núremberg Alemania |
Por supuesto que no es cierto, de hecho tengo uno y va genial, pero
me reía con el de la palabra utilizada "birria" que no "birra"
(cerveza), y manipulando los teléfonos tratábamos de sintonizar un
smart-watch que teóricamente debería de vender a Hugo.
Y haciendo pruebas y mas pruebas, entrábamos y salíamos de la
habitación. No es imaginable lo que habremos gastado en llamadas de
pruebas, menos mal que es sábado y son casi gratis.
 |
| Núremberg Alemania |
Hugo dudaba y dudaba, no acababa de decidirse, y al final se lo lleva
en préstamo para que lo pruebe y lo enseñe a sus compañeros a ver si se
animan y hacemos algún pequeño negocio.
Daniel ha quedado encantado con su móvil nuevo y enseguida se ha decidido en el trato.
Cuca flipaba con nuestro chalaneo, el mío sobre todo, y pensaba que: ¿Cuándo íbamos a ver una película?.
Y si, la hemos visto, "El Nombre de la Rosa" que nos ha gustado mucho
a todos a pesar de que algunos ya la habíamos visto mas de una vez.
Del buen cine uno nunca se cansa al igual que de la buena literatura.
Hace un rato se han ido a su casa y sinceramente la tarde ha transcurrido de una forma muy grata.
Nada mejor que reírse cuanto más mejor, y no es precisamente porque
estos amigos lo tengan fácil, en absoluto, pues Chari trabaja de lo
lindo para sacar a sus hijos para delante.
Hugo tiene un trabajo muy duro en Murcia recolectando naranjas y limones en jornadas exhaustivas que cobra por horas trabajadas.
Hoy la vida resulta dura para muchas personas que como ellos han
venido de Latino América para establecerse con nosotros, también para
infinidad de españoles nativos, pero si amenizamos nuestras veladas con
risas y buen humor todo se nos hace mas fácil.
Jóvenes y mayores juntos, intercambiando ideas, frases, aparatos,
conocimientos, y buenos ratos. Justo lo necesario para olvidarnos de
problemas y malos rollos.
Gracias amigos por una velada formidable en vuestra compañía.
emi
Waiting...
What for? am I waiting.
Good question my friend, but I have not any answer, I know I am
waiting since several years, just since the moment It was evident I was
getting old.
My body is old, my legs pains, my arms pains, my mind pains too and so I am one day and another.
So yes, I am waiting, to be beter?.
No, my God, that could be in other life but not in this one.
What could I wait for it would be being worst every single month or year
that I could live.
So, waiting what for?
I don´t wat to think deeply about that question, even I don´t want to answer it, may be my reply should be very sad.
In fact every day I am doing silly things that doesn´t produce
any good result, buying things I don´t need, surfing by internet several
hours a day, writing which ever single subject I think about, like this
one, listening new classical music, reading a new book, and what is the
better job looking after my dear Cuca who needs my help.
Doing such a lot of things the days pass away very fast and I do not think about what am I waiting for.
When my mother was living her last years she was in a big
building in company of several other old people.
The majority of them
were very old and their minds were not so good.
Nearly all of them were sitting on their chairs looking in front
of them, seeing nothing, doing nothing, just waiting the food, waiting
their pills, waiting for some relative who comes and visit them, a son, a
daughter, a friend, a grand daughter or son, but the majority of the
days, nobody comes to see them.
So, they were waiting, and waiting, their faces sad without any
emotion on them, only if you say something to them they smile and once
again remains on their seats without moving.
When I saw these persons my impression always was that they were awaiting the death.
They were aside of society, just parked like broken old cars that have been left by drivers who looks for a new one.
These people have move for long and they are just too old for be used by the society.
I don´t want to think I am also an old car, broken, too old, that is waiting for just die.
But evidently I am that old car that doesn´t stop because just
in the moment it remains sill it will be parked like the people I saw visiting my dear mother in that sad place.
gatufo
Huyamos lejos de todo
Todo va bien o mejor, millones de españoles y extranjeros han
aprovechado la semana santa para generar caja en hoteles, restaurantes,
gasolineras, autopistas, chiringuitos de playa, y de paso crear miles de
puestos de trabajo instantáneos que se esfumaran tan pronto pase la ola
de ciudadanos ansiosos por salir de sus casas, de su rutina, de
aguantarse mutuamente dentro de cuatro paredes harto conocidas.
No importa aguantar cientos de kilómetros de caravana, sufrir los
rigores del tiempo que nunca es previsible. Te asfixias, te congelas o
te calas hasta los huesos.
Este año ha habido suerte y todos estamos contentos pues el clima ha
respondido con días de sol, temperaturas agradables y millones de
desplazados llenando las arcas vacías de los lugares ansiosos por
recibirlos.
Vamos a la playa, a la montaña, al apartamento, a New York,
Italia, o cualquier lugar en el que podamos olvidarnos de la pesadez
cotidiana de aguantarnos en casa, en la oficina, en el trabajo, cuando
lo hay, o simplemente sumergirnos en un ambiente distinto que nos
propicie un ansiado y efímero cambio.
Cuatro días de descanso en los que el ansia general es huir, escapar,
evadirse, viajar, o visitar aquel lugar que tenemos siempre pendiente
de ver.
Los menos son los que efectivamente descansan quedándose en su sitio,
no escapando, simplemente paseando por calles y parques vacíos en los
que reina el silencio.
Los edificios quedan deshabitados y los cacos hace su agosto.
En el mío por ejemplo de once vecinos hemos permanecido en casa a lo
sumo dos, y si en algún momento los dos coincidimos en salir de paseo
justo en ese lapso de tiempo el edificio permanece absolutamente vacío a
merced de cualquier evento inesperado.
Antaño se disparaba la alarma de alguna fábrica u oficina y
permanecía sonando durante los cuatro días del merecido descanso de sus
trabajadores.
¿Cuantos edificios habrán quedado sin sus habitantes?.
Difícil de imaginar aunque supongo que muchos, demasiados,
demostrando la general estupidez de un huida masiva huyendo de la rutina
cotidiana que nos empuja hacia cualquier parte.
Por necesidad me toco estar en un lugar de playa durante cuatro años
mientras construían mi casa. De ciento cincuenta mil habitantes durante
el invierno se pasaban repentinamente a millón y medio en semana santa.
Un alfiler que cayera de punta sobre la playa no se clavaria en la
arena, lo haría en la carne de algún bañista o a lo sumo en su toalla.
Un auténtico infierno que duraba seis o siete días y del que deseaba evadirme como fuera.
La solución siempre era hacer compra para ocho o diez días y no pisar
un comercio ni por supuesto la orilla del mar en los cuatro días
álgidos de invasión masiva.
Cuando llovía daba pena ver a tantísima gente desorientada, sin saber
que hacer, refugiándose en algún bar y mirando el cielo por ver si
escampaba.
No habrían estado mejor en sus casa, me preguntaba, sin hallar una respuesta razonable.
Y se fomenta, interesa que todos salgan, que gasten, que se genere consumo masivo.
Dicen que así la economía crece, los trabajos (efímeros) aumentan y
luego te apabullan con cifras de llenos al ciento por ciento.
Maravilloso, medito, que bien se está en casa, en mi ciudad, paseando
por parques desiertos o aparcando donde a uno le venga en gana y ver
una buena película sin ningún agobio multitudinario.
el gatufo
Wake up
it is something difficult for me. Just the act of beginning a new day
after being sleep for hours required from me a big effort to start the
morning cheerful, with a smile in my face, even just saying something
like good morning my dear, have you sleep well?.
If there is something irregular in my life the first thought I have in the morning it is just this problem.
A
friend who is passing through difficulties, subjects with the family or
in the office, when I was working, and so forth...always the first
thought should be so.
I do
think it happens to nearly every person but sure I am not so certain
about this premise, not all people have to feel the same, that´s for
sure.
Good luck for them as getting up in bad mood it is always quite disagreeable for people around me.
Who
knows how a baby sleep? or an adult? it is always the form a baby
dreams to the way of an old person?. Why some people are a good wake up
and other a bad
humor just since there were born?
Being a
children it was hard to wake up to go to the school very soon. I could
remember that the hour of being in it was 8 a.m. every day and it cost
me a lot.
Madrid it is a city very cold in Winter. Usually we have less two or three degrees at the morning to reach up fourteen or fifteen at noon which it is a big difference and the body suffers this changes in temperatura aching a lot.
Now I could see that children go to the school being so small, and they use to cry aloud every morning just because the don´t want to go.
I do
think it is cruel what we do with the little babies taking them so
small to the nurseries every morning just because their parents have to
work.
Being a baby, a boy and finally and adult I have felt always the same, my humor is bad as son as I open my eyes in the mornings.
I need at least half an hour to get my humor in a good way, to talk or to reply some questions or even to be concious about the reality of a new day, good , bad or or the simple daily routine of the moment is living.
Yes, I can imagine what could be the feelings of a person that his life have changed suddenly from a day to another. The dead of a husband or a wife, a son or daughter, a sudden sickness or accident that changes our way of living for ever.
Just the first subject we use to think as my eyes are open is all the reality of the moment, the lack of my mother, a bad situation in the office, the last argue with my wife or a friend, and so on.
However
I know persons close to me that use to wake up brightness, happy, in
good mood to talk since the first moment they awake. Giving thanks of
being alive and facing reality with strength and courage undar any
circunstance.
I
admire these persons, my wife Cuca is one of them, and always I wanted
to be like them, to have this will from the first moment of the day.
Gift of
life and optimism of living just the moment without thinking anything
about, feeling that being alive it is the best gift a human could have.
Now that I am depressed it is even worst, mornings are the hard hour of the day. I want to remain in bed, one two three hours, or more. It is the feeling of not wishing to live a new day.
I would like to be like people, like Cuca, that every morning think "Thanks to God" I am alive and I want to conquer the world, things are as they are and no one can change them once occurred.
We can
do a better world with our mind, despite our weakness or missing
our loved ones, knowing that life is a daily struggle and that it
depends only of us, only from oneself doing happy every day of our life.
Just live in the moment without thinking about future and nothing more.
A big smile in the mornings, giving thanks to be alive and being in good humor to
say "good morning" my dear how are you?. Have you sleep well?....
That could be enough but use to be so difficult for some persons like me.
gatufo
Yes, we
are more or less the same as every other day, only something it is a
bit different Isabel is gone, the friend who was coming once a week to help me
with the chores of the house is now out of our life.
Instead we have Chari and Fabiola, who are really good doing their tasks very good.
So, another young woman has came to help me. From where?. Bolivia.
Chari, is her name as I said before, came to Spain the same form, without any papers just to work and earn more money than in her country.
What is happening in South America now?.
I do not really know. These persons works fast and well, why it is necessary for them to come here so far from their countries?.
Well may be despite here we are going now through bad times, this our European´s world after all has nothing to do with their world in South America.
----------
Talking about our world, our Spanish world what can I say now?.
It is easy, more soon that later we will be again fighting against adversity, that is for sure.
Nothing good is coming for the year 2015 till the moment.
The wealthy countries of Europe are going to be poor once more.
The
south is being left to their own luck, as a ship that is going deep to
the sea, and north European ´s politics are looking to another side, not
listening the shouts of help, help, of millions from the south.
Why? Who knows.
The
building buble, the banks, the politicians, we, the people spending too
much money than money that we could afford?. It could be just a Little
of all, we thought the time of being not so rich were over but reality
is coming faster every day.
Here,
in my country politicians said continously that it is necessary to
follow in the "State of good being"...."El estado del bien estar" but
what is that?.
What is
good being?. To have money to spend, to much money than we have? the
subject than we have only rights but not any obligations? The rule of
the less effort? Just that everything were for free?.
It seems to me that all these last years we have been living up our real situation. Listening so many lies we thought we were rich and spent too much euros that the amount we have.
But now we have to pay them.
Ir is impossible such amount, and we could pay only the interest of the loans,
what to do, just
to ask for more loans to pay the interest....and so on, year after year.....till when?.
Who knows, the debts are increasing and the saving decrease too much faster.
This
past years 2012, 13 and 14 and so on have been so bad, but I think the year we are living
now it could be even worst till the point no body knows, but politicians said it is going better.
But there is not enough work and thousand of youngs are out their country looking for a work.
I could
not understand how so many young people have to be off from here, it is
happening now in Spain the same situation than in South America some
years before?.
More
than 45 per cent of young people have not work, that is impossible of
support for a country where are so many retired persons are living.
They need to go out from here, year after year, the same that I would do if I could be in the same situation.
But mine now it is completely different, not grandsons, or granddaughters, so the future of my
family stop with my daughters..., and fortunately till the momment they could work.
Well, it is too much for today, I am going to bed and I prefer not to think in future.
Tomorrow will be another day to live, and that is enough for the momento.....just to be alive.
Greetings,
gatufo http://gatufo.blogspot.com.es/
Five years or something more was the time when I thought no body was going to read a single word of this ...what?
Blog?, it is how now everyone call this kind of writing on the web.
Years before people wrote with a pencil in a paper book, now there is not pen, not book.
Who could be interested in which ever single thing we have in mind?
A
good question, but now that I could see nearly three hundred thousand
of visit in this "gatufo blog" my responsability is different, and even
what I could say has to be some how interesting, at least for the kind
people who read this words now and them.
+++++
Going with what I could see round here, in Madrid´s streets and other cities of this country could be:
Another kind of problems appears from this chaos, yes that is so because some of us are thinking about Spain.
Spain? does exist this country?...or it is something I was teached and now that idea is not valid?.
Why?. Because every one out the centre of Iberia wants to be out of the Nation.
Spain? Not, it is better to be Cataluña, Comunidad Vasca, Canarias and so on........
Well, I would like that news, subjects, and so forth should be a little more clear as people at the end don´t understand anything.
This was the kind of subjets sometime I have written but now my mind is in other fields.....
Even now I could write more about the same ítems, but I am fed up.
I prefer to look to my nice cat Gatufo and forget what is happening round me, in my country, in Europe or in the World,, in fact I could do nothing about it.
It is possible that after a year I have learn anything to talk about?. May be, I like to write that is sure.
Thanks a lot if you have enough patience to read me in this blog even once and have enough patience to read till the end of some of the subjects.
gatufo
A sunday it is similar to a monday, we stay at home nearly all days of the week.
Writing here it is my task to go away from Madrid and be in the web with my blog´s friends.
Being a marry man, working all my life out home, I was very bad acustomed to do nearaly nothing at home.
My wife Cuca is sick, with a bad sickness "multiple esclerosis" and she likes to be indoors doing her life, Reading, listening to the radio, or the news and even, typing in the keyboard of her pc., so a sunday is a similar day to other day of the week.
The rutine of sundays is that a person comes home to do house chores, help me with the hard work of
a house. This person is like a friend of us now. For years she has been
coming on sundays because the rest of week days are working doing other
things.
These was before, it was was wrote last year, now just today everything has changed as I could say in other ocasión.
Every
day is coming Isabel, the peruvian friend to help me with the chores of
the house, little by little things change and this year 2014 it is
different from the last of 2012 or some years before.
Now I have help to look after my dear wife and home.
It was my wife, Cuca, who take care of the children and the house.
Suddenly she was ill, it seems her illness was going to pass soon, but it wasn´t so and at the end her husband, me, needs to start a new life as a house keeping.
Yes, this was a new life for me, taking care of my dear wife, looking for the supplies, cooking, going to shop, doing everything a girl or a woman it is supposed to do at home.
Why not men? ....A good question.
So last
year and today, of course, I understand very well what a good woman do
at home, it is a difficult work that is not appreciate for us, men, who
are absolutely selfish, proud of our Works out home.
Till
the moment a person start to do something different, he or she is not
aware of the difficult task a house could be, and yes for me it is.
Here at home I have known something about house chores, but outside this my little world I do not know what is happening in the outdoors world.
Yes, the world of outside home, the Spain´s world, The Europa´s world, and so forth....what is happening over there?
So easy to know that I am fed up about the bad news of every day.....
emi
Hace poco reflexionaba sobre el hecho de ser o no ser abuelo habiendo sido, como es lógico, previamente padre.
Pues bien, siguiendo con el tema dentro de mi cabeza he llegado a la conclusión de que ni lo soy, ni tengo ya ganas de serlo.
Muchos se preguntarán
por que dice este sujeto que ni ganas de serlo, no es fácil de explicar
y le he dado muchas vueltas dentro de mi coco.
Hay momentos, breves, que envidio a los abuelos.
Las criaturas de
meses o de pocos años son encantadoras. Nos mueven a la mas profunda
ternura y subliman nuestros mas íntimos sentimientos de protección y
amor hacia ellos. Quien no va a envidiar el sentir amor por esos seres
tan pequeños y frágiles que te tienden los pequeños brazos y piden
cariño a tope.
Al poco tiempo te dan
su manita y puedes pasear con ellos, y lo mejor te llaman abuelo, abu,
yayo, o simplemente abuelito aunque seas un gigante al lado de ellos.
El placer es enorme
cada vez que una persona ve a sus nietos pequeños. La ternura, el
tiempo, la dedicación que a veces no se pudo tener con los hijos es para
el nieto o la nieta.
Así era hace años al
menos, pero ahora están cambiando las costumbres y mas que "nietos" se
vuelve a tener "hijos", si hijos a los que cuidar, alimentar, velar,
vigilar, y llevar al cole o la guardería día tras día cuando empiezan a
no ser ya bebés.
Durante dos o tres
años los han criado en casa como una segunda versión de hijos, no se es
abuelo o abuela, se vuelve a ser padre o madre, con los sofocos, apuros,
temores, trabajos, sinsabores y todas las delicias que previamente
proporcionaron los primeros hijos.
Pero a los hijos
si pudimos educarles según su/nuestro criterio, a los segundos
hijos-nietos ni tan siquiera eso, por que no somos sus padres y los que
si lo son, hijos, yernos o nueras se encargan de recordarlo una y otra
vez, según he escuchado a algunos amigos.
No es solo la falta
de libertad que supone volver a criar hijos, ni el trabajo, ni el
dinero, es simplemente el ser y no ser padres de ellos simultaneamente.
Se chupan todo el
trabajo, los nuevos abuelos, como si fueran sus padres pero el criterio o
la decisión de como educar NO les corresponde.
Tampoco hay ningún
tipo de agradecimiento, al contrario se tienen que sentir contentos y
agradecidos de ser utiles, y poder disfrutar de la compañía y el cariño
de los nietos a costa del trabajo, la falta de libertad, de sueño y a
veces las malas caras.
He visto y escuchado
amargas quejas de algunos abuelos a los que conozco, que SI quieren
mucho a sus nietos que prácticamente crían de ellos, pero en el fondo,
muy en el fondo están hartos, cansados de repetir la historia de criar
unos segundos hijos a los que muy pronto perderán de vista y sobre los
que NO se les atribuye ningún derecho a opinar o marcar unas reglas
educativas.
Con todo lo expuesto, y más que callo por prudencia, repito que
"no soy abuelo" ni ganas de serlo.
Es duro de afirmar
algo parecido, seguro que me pierdo algo bonito y grandioso que nos hace
sentir mejores, soporto y soportaré las miradas de pena que me lanzan
otros abuelos por el hecho tan triste de no ser abuelo como ellos, pero
se que algunas veces, en el fondo, me envidian por no afrontar las
responsabilidades, falta de libertad y trabajo que sufren ellos.
Pienso que la
sociedad, el gobierno, la publicidad, los medios abusan alabando "la
gran labor que desarrollan los abuelos" pero que poco hacen por ellos.
Bonitas palabras, que buenos son, que labor tan necesaria hacen, y poco más.
Cuando estos mismos abuelos se vean solos, arrinconados en sus casas, o en un asilo, y ni los nietos ni los hijos vayan a ver
a los viejos, a los
ancianos que les cuidaron y les ayudaron cuando hizo falta, quien se va a
acordar de las miles de horas que gastaron haciendo una labor que no
les correspondía, del cariño que demostraron hacia los pequeños, ahora
mayores "que nunca tienen tiempo" de ir a verlos, de darles cariño, de
devolver un poquito del amor recibido, y entonce que?.
Que se dice de ellos,
el gobierno, la sociedad consumista e inhumana en la que vivimos, y
finalmente los hijos y nietos a los que cuidaron y que están muy
ocupados para cuidar a sus mayores o dedicarles algún rato de su tiempo
en darles compañía y cariño.
Que labor tan útil y
necesaria hacen los abuelos, sustituyendo a los padres, y que poco
agradecimiento reciben luego cuando más necesitan del cariño de los que
cuidaron y el reconocimiento de esa Sociedad Hipócrita que les alaba
cuando son utiles y les olvida cuando dejan de serlo.
Luego, se mueren solos, miles de ellos en sus casas sin que a nadie le preocupe los más mínimo o se apolillan en una residencia esperando la visita que casi nunca llega.
Está claro que es mi opinión en base a lo que he visto y veo constante y repetidamente.
Espero no ofender a nadie y si lo hiciera pido perdon a quien se sienta como tal.
el gatufo
Tres años han pasado
ya desde que deseabas morirte, y aquí estás vivo y coleando, como pez
recién sacado del rió que sigue vivo aunque se está asfixiando, colea,
salta, y a veces es preferible tronchar su espina para que tenga una
muerte rápida y no por asfixia.
Deja de sufrir, piensas, y te consuela el hecho de acabar con una vida.
No es tu caso ahora, no te asfixias como te sucedía hace dos años, en
que ni siquiera tenias ganas de colear o saltar, eras un algo muerto,
esquelético, fantasmagórico, como un ánima en pena que iba de un sillón a
otro durmiendo casi todo el día, deseando que el verano llegara a su
final y sin saber que hacer con el pequeño hálito de vida que aún
persistía dentro de ti.
Julio fue un
infierno el año 2012, como suelen ser todos los julios en Madrid, y
Agosto no concedió ningún alivio, llegó Septiembre y decidiste que era
hora de visitar a la doctora de familia.
Sin fuerzas, sin ánimo, deseando que el final llegara pronto y rápido,
como pez que tronchan el espinazo y ponen fin a su sufrimiento, y la
historia acaba para el, así te sentías tu deseando que cayera un rayo
del cielo y te fulminara al instante.
Así estabas esperando
turno para hablar con la doctora y contarle tu aburrida situación de
intentar acabar con un virus, el VHC, y el intento fallido pues que
habías hecho sin poder superarlo, tuviste que suspenderlo haciendo bueno
el refrán de "que a veces el remedio es peor que la enfermedad"
Sin síntomas visibles
durantes meses o años antes de empezar el tratamiento, el VHC no da
síntomas, dos meses después eras una ruina física y psíquica, con una
anemia brutal, sin defensas, sin plaquetas, el organismo alterado, con
cuatro o cinco kilos menos, pesando solo cincuenta y nueve en una
estatura de 1,76 eras como un ser escapado de un campo de exterminio,
así te sentías esperando ser recibido por la doctora, y lo peor de todo,
"la depresión" causada por los fármacos, el "Interferón"/ "Telaprevir" y
la "Rivabirina" que habias abandonado en el mes de junio porque tu
cuerpo no soportaba más, tampoco tu espíritu, y se hacía ya necesaria
una transfusión urgente que salvara tu vida y te permitiera continuar el
tratamiento endiablado durante un año si es que podías superarlo sin
morir en el intento.
Ya no tenías fuerzas y animo para nada de este mundo, solo tristeza mezclada de frustración y desesperación absoluta.
Un análisis de sangre lo primero dijo la doctora, pues ella no podía
creer lo que el último test sanguíneo mostraba y no entendía como no se
habían hecho otros, le costó entenderlo y por tres veces te pregunto si
no habían hecho alguno más después del que le mostrabas.
Resultaba incomprensible para ella pues tu vida había estado en un tris de acabar, como muy bien sabías.
Informado fuiste de
que podías sufrir un infarto o angina de pecho con
los glóbulos rojos, leucocitos y hemoglobina, tan bonísimos en sangre
que no aportaban oxigeno al músculo cardíaco ni al resto de tu cuerpo.
El análisis fue lo suficiente correcto para no asustarse, al menos es lo
que la doctora comentó, con lo que a renglón seguido empezó el
tratamiento antidepresivo administrado por ella misma.
Gracias
doctora, pensante, que no me envía al psiquiatra pues no hubiera ido y
por supuesto menos posibilidades, o más quien sabe, de salir de la
oscuridad.
Y que decir, sabias
lo que es una depresión pues con treinta y tantos pasaste una que te
duró dos años largos, te hizo perder mas de doce kilos, y pensabas que
nunca saldrías del pozo.
Es lo normal que
siente un alma sumida en una profunda depresión. La vida no tiene ningún
significado, es continuo sufrimiento, hasta el punto que lo único que
deseas es que acabe cuanto antes.
Así comenzaste Octubre, siguiendo un tratamiento que de momento pensabas
te empeoraba, iluso, la depresión no se cura en dos, tres o seis meses,
menos si no ganas peso ni fuerzas para combatirla.
Ni aún así, nadie garantiza nada, y la sensación es tan horrible que el mundo no tiene significado alguno.
Rezaste a Dios, si rezaste, aunque parezca increíble en ti,
hombre agnóstico que durante años no había rezado ni
aparentemente creído casi en nada, con la fe que da la certeza de la
existencia de Dios.
Rezaste ante tu
propia ruina, y pediste que El te sacara de la oscuridad, del pozo sin
fondo en el que unas substancias concebidas para curar, te habían
conducido.
Curar, a costa de que?, habría que preguntarse.
No puedo entenderlo, no puedo entender como te dejaste conducir a
semejante tratamiento cuando sabias, presagiabas lo que iba a suceder.
Y la historia, tu historia continua aunque la dejaremos para otro momento pues mis lectores estarán aburridos en este punto.
emi
It
is just a pity but it is the truth, what can I talk about?. My head is
blocked and being so bad I am absolutely fed up with so much talking
about the euro. loans, public deficit, prime risk, and what is even worst european´s politicians who do nothing or past away from the problems of the European´s south countries.
Politicians from the European North countries are against any help to Greek, Spain, Portugal or Italy.
These countries make a lot of electronic machines, gadgets or high technology but what about food?.
What about fruits, vegetables, jamon, wine, good oil and so fort?.
Evidently
they can´t eat a celular as a Nokia, a car as Mercedes or a high design
furniture as human beings need food, to be feed.
South Europeans countries as Italy, Greek, Spain or Portugal do have a lot of food to feed their people
and to export north countries that have so bad wether, but also need
money to buy the high technology products from the North or to pay the
social necessities of the citizens.
My country, Spain, has all these kind of good food that North Europeans like so much.
So please, don´t be so proud about your money....if you don´t sell to us you are not going to be feed with nice oranges, strawberries, olive oil, and all kind of fruits or vegetables out of time.
B.C.E., Brussels, don´t be so much serious about strict rules, don´t have your hands so closed to let currency fluency.
We need loans, of course, but you need to sell your productions and also to recover your loans to Mediterraneas countries.
Here in my country there is a saying that says:
"If your debt is a thousand you have a problem but if your debt it is of some thousand millions it is just the problem of the other"....Be careful about this subject.
So if countries like Greek, Spain or Portugal decides to go out from the euro.........not conceivable by now......the problem should be a global one not only a problem for us.
Be alert countries like Finland, Denmark, Netherland or Germany as the fall should be general.... to what countries are you going to sell your technology? how are you going
to recover your loans?. Think about it, please, and don´t be so slow in
taking resolutions, not be so strict and not impose so much hard rules
to be accomplished
by us. With your actitude you are making too much suffering to our south people.
Have also in mind that countries from south Europe are the cradle of modern culture as law, theatre, art, numbers, calendar, religion, medicine, mathematics and so forth.
The best ancient thinkers are from Greek, Philosophy, Mathematics, Astronomie....
Think about the seven Athem´s
wise men: Tales de Mileto, Bias de Priene, Solom of Athens, Quilon of
the Cedemonia (Esparta), Periandro de Corinto, Cleobulo de Lindos, and
Pitaco of Mitileno.
Also think in Averroes, (Cordoba), Avicena (Cordoba), Seneca, Adriano, Trajano, all of them were born in Spain.
Sócrates, Platón, and Aristóteles. Arquimides, Pitagoras, from Greek.
Leonardo da Vinci, Rafael,
Gioto, Vivaldi, ...Leonardo di Medici, Italian Renaissance, The Roman
Law....the list could be endless.
The Western culture comes from these ancient civilizations, do not forget that.
It is sure that if Greek goes out from euro, followed by Spain, Portugal, Ireland and Italy, .......the world crack would be unthinkable.
Think and please stop your threats and your impositions that are unenforceable for us the poor people of south.
Our countries have millenniums of culture to be afraid now, just do another thing instead
and it will be sure that Europe could be good for every all people and
all the countries of Europe, the same from the south and for the north.
It is enough, people are killing themselves all ove the south due for the hard circunstances of these years.
They
can´t pay their house mortages because they have lost their works,
their hopes, their self-steem and at the end some are killing themselves
too.
Do you know about that or you don´t know anything about what is happening along the last two or three years?.
Your politicians are so bad as to do nothing to find a good solution to these problems.
This is a world´s crisis that could affect to every body here, there, and it could longs for too many years.
My best to all of us.
gatufo
BACK TO LIVE THE SAME EXPERIENCEIt
seems that everything in my life now is a constant "déjà vu" , because
what I feel see and think sometimes it is repeated once and again so
that I have the feeling of having lived that experience before.
Sometimes
it is the same "mea culpa" for actions that I have made and I promised
not to repeat again, I feel the same tired before the reality of every
day, the same boredom to what is happening which is usually a relentless
repetition of facts, ideas, actions, speeches or actions unrelated to me but that affects me again and again.
The human being of thousand years before only lived thirty or forty years optimistic, and I guess it was enough to make life essentially, they were born, grow up, be adults soon after , and die soon, only lived to have more children and be dead almost immediately.They lived their childhood, adolescence / youth / love with luck, and sooner than later they have children and very rarely grandchildren.He lived needed to continue to spread our species, it seems to be the goal of all living creatures that inhabit this planet.Today probably we live too much, we have enough time. We have enough time, those serving over fifty, to repeat and live experiences over and over again.
We
return to take care of our children, grandparents and parents
simultaneously, stability-instability, development-recession, relativism
faith-backward progress, social gains-lost rights, freedom, repression,
and so many of the values certainly supposedly won through struggle
and wars are now in question again as on decades later.It is sometimes tired, at least for me, and I feel some skepticism seeing repeated the cycles, live them again and again over a single lifetime.
And what is worse, to repeat the same mistakes that we promised not to commit once and again. There is a sayin that said "a donkey does not stumble twice on the same Stone". Why humans stumble so often on that ssme stones?. Yes, that happens countless.I wonder:How many recessions since the 30sHow many social reforms.How many laws enacted by remedying our lives.How many wars past and present in so few years.The rights won and then lost.The list is endless.
All this living in the same own life.
And the feeling we live the same story, that the script, is repeated once and again makesme feel that "deja vu" constantly.Yes, there are unrepeatable experiences in the life of any human being, and minethere .... few but selected and they will not ever repeat again.Falling in love, the first salary, the first and subsequent children, a trip with theloved one, and some more facts ..... all that one some extent living may have lived.
Some more than others, of course, that depends on luck?The destination?Who knows?........In this world so dull and repetitive for people, like me, who have lived enough there something new that I love quite a lot, I like and want to learn about,..............
Computer, web, internet, social pages and everything that involves the multimedia world it is facinating.
Yes, this is new and I have never quite felt that the history of somehowtake other paths, for better or worse and that depend of us.
But at least for the computer world I do not feel that "deja vu" that re-living situations that I know I have lived years before.In some ways it's great, at least I do think so.
emi
