LAST YEAR

Last year many people were so tired or more than me, but could not so much suffering, no job, no home, no future. Many could not stand more and left.
They took the decision to leave forever and stop suffering uncertainty to be alive.
And now it's as if nothing had happened, who remembers?.
Greece, Italy, Spain to name a country where which were no longer support more?. Who remembers them?.  
It's like never despair never existed, not written, there is no record of his anguish, a day left and that's it.

It's not my case, I had no reason at all those poor things were, they had every reason YES.
I do remember September last year and is not written, did not write anything, but just that, by the absence of written records of the everyday despair.

One moment, whom I speak,  you're asking who you are?.
Your conscience, or whatever you call your inside.

Then follow if I do not speak for anyone except for myself or for anyone who wants to read this.

When I check this blog I see that in September 2012 did not write anything, not a note, as happened in October, but earlier in August I made ​​only one entry, and in July I made ​​three on the London Olympics.

This significant lack of comments is more articulate about what happened to me last year than any other story I could do then.

The internal suffering persists when I look back, soon erased when you think you're dying, or when you want to do as a priority over the fatigue of hopelessness.

How many times have initiated this kind of memory?, Three or four?, At least, and it is rare for there home, and I live and write is, it goes no further. There will be time to reread and correct.

For those who were no longer words. As dry and withered leaves them dragged the hurricane unleashed by an incomprehensible to many people crisis.

Only those who are suffering, or who have memory can remember what it was last summer, last year, this year continues as if nothing what happened was over with the hopes and dreams of millions.
The only thing I can remember is that it was really good
......
fifteen kilos less, defenseless, a brutal anemia, I lacked the strength to walk ten minutes at, surrounded by ghosts when she went out, and so one month followed by another.

Around this time a great depression motivated by the dire physical condition of this guy named Emiliano.
April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November and December 2012, notes in this blog 18 total.
Nonexistent actually, as I was. Nonexistent Like many others, the worst is that they / them if they ceased to exist.

In my case I still, I write, more than ever, the same person and I write like a man possessed. 910 notes May to September, this 911.

What has changed?.
Outwardly little, the same or similar heat, the same person but with 15 kilos more, with adequate blood levels and NO DEPRESSION.

We are like putty, inexplicable laboratory we think we have control.

And NO, we have no control.

If we had many of those who left might be reading this, your life has changed, perhaps better, like mine.
Who had control in my case?
do not know, maybe GOD?.

I prefer to believe that yes, HE saved me to do just what I do. Hawking, Bury, cheerleading, ultimately WRITE.



gatufo